Help, I need Somebody.

Today, I woke up, all sad and depressed. So I decided since I needed to vent about it, and since no one would answer my "hey I need to talk to you" texts, I decided to write some of the things that are bothering me.
I miss my grandfather. Like a lot. Every day, for me, it gets harder and harder. I miss going to the convalescent home every Sunday after dinner, watching him become a human string bean, watching him basically die. Those images of him not being able to eat, especially those last ten days, make me cry. I miss him perhaps way more than I should. I miss the days before the name dementia was in our vocabulary, when he was healthy and happy, and fighting my grandmother whenever it was dinner time. I miss all of those memories.
I am always at ends with my dad, and I was always wondering why. He's nothing but a stranger who I look like, barely. I don't remember ever getting along with him, I don't remember him ever being in my life, so if he was in it now, it doesn't feel permant. Like it's written in permant marker.
School is also stressful because of college applications and AP work. There are things that I don't want to do, but yet I am forced to do. I got into college isn't that good enough for you people? Stop pressuring me and let me eat my chocolate..
Help. I need someone. I need someone to talk to me, to understand me, to tell me that I'm pretty. I want a thousand hershey kisses and of course I want a hug. And someone to listen.