To Love Someone?

Yesterday, a friend told me that if you liked someone for more than four months that means that you love them. Me, being someone that has liked someone for more than seven months, is left questioning that theory. Am I falling in love? Or am I already in love, but just not admitting it to myself? And then all those questions of falling in love the crazy way, and the fears of becoming that annoying, always in love, always talking about the person that they are in a relationship with come to mind.
Whatever happened to just not thinking about what your feelings are? Why do we second guess them to logic...why do we learn to love with our brain, due to the ones that have broken our heart, and forget how to love with our hearts, for the ones that matter the most? Whatever happened to being crazy, to just trusting our guts on everything. Like Rose said in the movie Titanic, "it's crazy, that's why I trust it." So, why can't we trust the gut feeling of knowing what is right, and ignoring the doubts that our brains give us?
First of all, it's the feeling of fear of being heartbroken. We fear that if we take a chance for some kind of romance or something, we will fall and crash and somehow end up even more scarred then beforehand.
Second of all, it's the feeling of logic. Logic clouds pretty much all of our emotions, especially ones with the heart. Logic of what sounds crazy, making it sound to us that the intial thought is crazy, and logic scars us, keeping us from ever doing something crazy.
Or maybe it's both.
My love life, for the past year, has been trying to shake the memory of my past. It's been trying to let go of everything, and to find out what I really want. I had to figure out what exactly I wanted from a relationship, in order to ever have a new one.
Seven months ago (about), I had woken up, gotton dressed, all that fun stuff, expecting the third day of school to be like normal. It wasn't after walking into my third period class. I had met someone who I knew in the instant that I had laid eyes on him, that I liked him. And everyday, for the past seven months, the feelings that I had day did not cease, but grew stronger as I got to know him. Friends think that I am crazy for not telling him how I felt, but I guess that in love, maybe crazy is the norm. One of these days, when the mood is right I will finally tell him..and hope that he likes me too.
Maybe to love someone is to forget all fears, and to just listen to your heart.
(A little sidenote: I dedicate this blog entry to a friend of mine who I've mentioned early, the one who told me about that four month thing. She is like a "little sister" to me, and has taught me to be more carefree when it comes to love. Even though I have taught her my secerts to love, and flirting, she has taught me how to shed all of the fears that I may have and just listen to my heart. I thank her for that, and I hope that no boy messes with her heart, the way I was messed with. And if they do, things won't get too pretty. And she also has excellant music taste. Just saying)